The Valley of the Shadow of Death
by Colt in the Moon
Summary: A young preacher discovers a important secret concerning Zombies in Zombieland. Will he live to tell it to another? And What happens when Wichita Columbus and Little Rock get involved. Who is Zombie Jesus? Read and find out!
1. Chapter 1

_The Valley of the Shadow of Death_

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Chapter 1; The Gutenberg

The bible is going to have to need some serious revision, thought Father Nicholas, staring out into the empty masses of zombies in the direction of the library.  
Why was the library so important, you might ask? In that library was a bible. And it wasn't just any old B-I-B-L-E you could find in any old hotel room. It was an authentic Gutenberg bible.  
Nicholas checked the ammo in his semi-automatic and stepped out of the car. The librarian sprinted out of the library at him.  
BANG!! BANG!!  
Father Nicholas pulled the trigger and the librarian fell down on the steps dead. Nicholas made a sign of the cross over the woman's body and said sincerely, "May God grant you eternal rest."  
All around him zombies were lured by the sound of the gunfire. He quickly ran into the library. Looking around he spotted a flag pole that he prayed would hold long enough for him to retrieve the Gutenberg.  
He slipped it through the handles of the doors holding them shut, and ran off to where the Gutenberg would probably be.

***

He found it partially open. Blood and god know what else was stained upon the pages, blurring many of the verses. Father Nicholas set his gun down and looked more closely at the open page. It was turned to Isaiah, chapter 26. The only verses that were legible were the last verses of the chapter that read

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19 But your dead will live; their bodies will rise. You, who dwell in the dust, wake up and shout for joy. Your dew is like the dew of the morning; the earth will give birth to her dead.  
20 Go, my people, enter your rooms and shut the doors behind you; hide yourselves for a little while until his wrath has passed by.  
21See, the LORD is coming out of his dwelling to punish the people of the earth for their sins. The earth will disclose the blood shed upon her; she will conceal her slain no longer

He looked up towards heaven and prayed, "Lord, what are you trying to tell me?" he asked.  
CRRRAAAASSSSHHH.  
A zombie had broken one of the windows. Well, that's my cue, Father Nicholas thought, and ran towards the back entrance as the zombies began to pour into the empty library.  
Father Nicholas ran around the building toward the front. Most of the zombies were already in the library, and he quickly dispatched the rest with a pray as he got into his black Toyota truck, and sped back to the cathedral he now called home.

Father Nicholas thought about the last few months. The end of the world had happened, and nothing like the bible said. During the last few weeks before everything shut down, you could still watch the news. That is unless you were a shut in playing a World of Warcraft or Facebook that was devoid of players. The news was able to release more information that had been discovered about the zombie virus. Those actually were the first signs, when Facebook, MySpace, and all those other games went down, you knew something was wrong.

The virus attacked the brain, and utterly consumed all of a certain hormone. When the entire amount of the hormone was devoured, the person entered into what seemed to be a coma or deep sleep. During this phase of the disease the virus altered the brain chemistry to make the host hunger for more of the hormone, and get it with any means necessary. Even if that meant feasting on other humans to get it.

Normally two shots to one of the three vital organs, the brain, the liver, and heart, would take them out. One shot each to any two of these, was also sufficient.

Nicholas pulled into the enclosed parking lot of the cathedral. He quickly got out of the truck and locked the gate of the garage. There was no other way in, and zombies were about as strong as normal everyday people.

He went back and opened the door to get the Gutenberg bible into the church. It was strangely open. It was the book of John, chapter 11. Many of the words were again smeared with blood and barely legible, all except for verses 38-44, which read;

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38 Jesus, intensely moved again, came to the tomb. (Now it was a cave, and a stone was placed across it.) 39 Jesus said, "Take away the stone." Martha, the sister of the deceased, replied, "Lord, by this time the body will have a bad smell, because he has been buried four days." 40 Jesus responded, "Didn't I tell you that if you believe, you would see the glory of God?" 41 So they took away the stone. Jesus looked upward and said, "Father, I thank you that you have listened to me. 42 I knew that you always listen to me, but I said this for the sake of the crowd standing around here, that they may believe that you sent me." 43 When he had said this, he shouted in a loud voice, "Lazarus, come out!" 44 The one who had died came out, his feet and hands tied up with strips of cloth, and a cloth wrapped around his face. Jesus said to them, "Unwrap him and let him go."

Damn, zombies

, Nicholas thought as he quickly shut the book and rushed inside the cathedral.

The distinctive rattle of chains could be heard from the front pews. Many times Nicholas had wondered if he has down the right thing.

A zombie woman and child were chained to the pews. They were his wife and daughter.

He uncovered the dead nun's flesh from the silver palter in front of the altar of Jesus. Next to it was a goblet containing human blood. "God forgive me" he said to the silent icon hanging on the wall.

Then he made sure that his wife's chains were tightened.

Then he held the dangling piece of the dead nun's flesh in front of her. She opened her mouth and leaned towards it unable to reach. Father Nicholas placed the bit of meat in her mouth, muttering the worlds. "And Jesus said to them, 'eat', this is my body."

He did the same with his daughter.

He went back the table which normally held crackers and grape juice. Now, on top of it was a recently deceased nun. Father Nicholas drained her blood, a rich burgundy color, slightly congealed, and filled up a goblet.

Next was the most dangerous part. Father Nicholas placed his hand on his wife's face. Suddenly she twitched and her head turned, catching his finger on her mouth. She bit down.

"Ahhhhhh" Father Nicholas screamed. His blood was falling to the floor where his wife and daughter eagerly lapped it up.

He walked over to the container of holy water where he drained a small rag and wrapped it around his thumb, stopping the bleeding.

He refilled the goblet with new blood from the nun, and walked back over to his wife and daughter, chained near the front pews.

They were in a serene type of piece now. They moved not a muscle while he held their faces, pouring the richly tasting blood into their mouths.

Father Nicholas unwrapped the rag from his thumb and took a look at the bite wound. It was already a sickly green-yellow color. Pus was beginning to ooze out of the opening.

He looked up to the figure of Jesus on the cross. Please help me Lord, he pleaded and passed out

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	2. Chapter 2

Let the dead bury the dead

Father Nicholas woke up three days later. The gutenberg bible laying in his hands. It was open to the gospel of John.

"Lazarus, come forth. And he that was dead came forth."

Am I a zombie

? father nicholas thought. He searched the inner recessess of his mind. He craved human flesh, but a odd and powerful rational force was pushing this to the side.

"Lazarus, Come Forth." it called.

It was his lord

, nicholas thought. He decided that from then on forth he would go by the name of Lazarus.

"Thank you lord," he said audibly. He could still talk.

He walked to his wife and daughter, chained to the front pews, and unchained them. The two zombies stood up but otherwise remained still.

Lazarus raised his arms, and the two zombies closely watched it, like dogs watch tennis balls.

Looking back at the bible the wind from a broken window.  
It is time for my great work, he thought. It is time to write the book of the dead, the Necronomicon.

For the survival of the human race. Zombies and humans must live together peacefully.

Lazaurus smiled a crooked smile. It was time to go hunting.

***

Cheyenne was walking down the abandoned highway looking for a useable car.

Nope. Nothing

. she thought.

She was really hoping that the delorean she had found would work. No such luck.

A loud and low growl reverberated through the air, and a sharp ragged voice echoed from the abandoned highway wilderness.

""Now this will be the plague with which the LORD will strike all the peoples. Their flesh will rot while they stand on their feet, and their eyes will rot in their sockets, and their tongues will rot in their mouth. On that day a large-scale panic from the LORD will spread among them. One person will grab the hand of another, and one will attack the other."

She thought it sounded biblical.

Suddenly a great big swarm of zombies sprang out of the abandoned cars around her. This is way too planed.

She fired her 12 guage Remington into the swarm. A few of the undead horde fell.

The gun clicked empty.

Crap.

The zombies' diseased mouths came closer, drooling.

The same ragged voice suddenly called out, "Stop, do not harm her."

The zombies paused. Equally stunned cheyenne froze. Looking at the origin of the voice she saw a lone figure standing. It looked like some kind of preacher or priest.

It was also clearly obvious that the figure was a zombie. He slowly walked up towards her.

"Save her." it told the others.

turning toward her he said, "Zombies can't survive forever, eventually if left unchecked, human kind would go extinct, and with it, zombies as well. Count yourself lucky. You're a member of a endangered species."

He thumped her on the head and everything went black.

***

"Huh" Cheyenne murmured, coming to. "Where am I?"

She was in a cage. It was a fairly large cage and a couple of other people were in there with her. A girl with long black and a scared looking boy.

"Here" the dark haired girl said, handing her a water bottle. "I'm Wichita Rock and this is Daniel. As far as we know, this place could be Iowa or something. More likely somewhere in Oregon or something though."

"Hi, I'm Cheyenne" she said. "So what happened to you guys."

"We were on our way back from an amusement park and headed to Bill Murray's mansion, which we thought would make a great long term residence. We stayed there a night or two and absolutely no zombies showed up."

Cheyenne listened intently.

"Suddenly the place was surrounded by zombies. Hundreds of them came from out of nowhere. Tallahassee ran full speed into the mass with a butter knife. Actually managed to get like ten or so zombies down before they overwhelmed him.

My little sister Lily Rock was really scared and got bit.

Then a dry raspy voiced echoed through the air and all the zombies stopped attacking. A zombie thing came walking up and actually talked!!!

He thumped us with a basball bat and we woke up here. That happened a few days ago, they just brought you in this morning."

***

"D I N N E R Time" a voice outside the room echoed.

A little figure entered into the room.

"Oh my god, Lily! I thought you were dead"

The zombified Lily Rock just smiled. "I am." she passed a few plates of delicious looking food into the cage. "Here's your guys dinner. Don't ask."

"Are you okay? Who was that guy who controlled the other zombies?"

"That's Lazarus, he was turned a few weeks ago and still was slightly human. He thinks this was all god's plan. I guess all that whole 'life after death' thing wasn't taken as literal as it should have been."

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End file.
